My not-really-yoga classes

7 months pregnant

I feel enormous, and I'm ready for this pregnancy to be over. But I'm measuring and weighing exactly the same as at this point with Gabe, but without that hideous cough, so I guess I should be happy. And at my dr's appt yesterday I had only gained .5 pound a week for the last 5 weeks! I was very happy about that.

In my attempts to stay in shape, stay relaxed, and mostly meet other moms, I had been searching and searching for a yoga class for pregnant women, and thought I had finally found one. Only when I showed up, it was all women over the age of 60. The instructor assured me we all have the same physical requirements so I would be fine. All the pregnant girls go at night and this was a morning class. Oh, and then she also revealed that although she is a yoga instructor, she actually things yoga poses are bad for the body and she doesn't like it so really it's a therapeutic exercise class. um, ok. I decided to swallow my hesitations and even though it created a mess with babysitting, etc, to try the night class because more than exercise I was looking for community - other moms of babies to play with in the park, etc. I also signed up for her preparation for labor class - once a week for 4 weeks - same reasoning.

I have to say the only way to get through it is to think about it comically. First, the exercise class is a joke. We just stretch, and LAY ON OUR BACKS for long periods of time. The first time I abstained (in the old lady class) and she totally called me to task in front of the whole class and told me it was a lie that pregnant women shouldn't lay on their backs. ok. then I started the labor prep class. I didn't bring pen and paper to take notes so she very snippily gave me some. Then she sits at the front of the class and recites very slowly what she has to say so that we can note down word for word her information. Um, if you want me to have your exact words why don't you just make me a photocopy??? She also told us that we can't swim because we could get bacteria from the pool, and that if we had certain problems with our pregnancy, to call HER, and she'll tell us whether we need to contact the doctor. oh, and the doctor knows if we need an epidural or pain relievers or not, so don't ask for them or contradict his opinion in any way. Oh, and it's selfish to ask to hold your baby as soon as it's born, the nurses need to clean and review him first and they'll pass him to you when it's the correct time. and...I could go on.

Needless to say, she brings out the rebelious in my personality. I prompty left and signed up for an aquagym class. Which is also all women over the age of 65 that really go to talk (seriously, I'd say 30% of the women are even attempting to exercise) but I absolutely love it. I can do things however light or strenuous I want, and my belly weighs NOTHING in the water! And the old ladies LOVE my pregnant belly and are super friendly and even invited me to lunch today!

Now I have to tell her that I'm not coming back for the second month of classes...I don't think she'll mind, she doesn't seem to like me much anyway!