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Monday, November 12, 2007

Good Nap Schedule = Entrapment

I was obsessed with ensuring that my baby would be a good sleeper. Before he was even born I had read "Healthy Sleep, Happy Child" and "Duermete NiƱo" (the Spanish equivalent to Baby Wise) cover-to-cover, and during his first weeks of frequent nightly wakings I re-read while I nursed. I can now report that we have had a good measure of success. By 10 weeks he was sleeping through the night. He now wakes up in the morning, is awake about 1 1/2 hours, takes a good 2 hour nap, is awake another 1 1/2 -2 hours, takes another good nap, and has a third 45 min, snooze in the late afternoon. He falls asleep on his own, in his own bed, in his own room. He starts to fuss, and I put him into bed with a kiss and chau.

However, all this sleeping means I can NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE, for fear of messing up his nap schedule, and thus suffering the whiny, fussy consequences. And I've trained him to sleep so well in his bed, that if he's NOT in his bed, he doesn't sleep so well. All of my out-of-house experiences have to be between 5 and 8 in the evening. During the week I've mostly come to terms with this, but Saturdays it drives me crazy!! I think Saturday's are the day to do something fun, yet I'm still trapped by his nap schedule, and seriously, what fun can be had in under an hour?? Some days I don't even change him out of his pajamas before 5pm because what's the point? He's just going back to bed! What did I do wrong and how do I fix it ??????
On a more upbeat note, Gabe is officially social. I was worried that he didn't really like other people because he tends to turn his head away when strangers try to talk to him, but he is just starting to react to and smile to other kids. Here he is happily sharing his toys with Sofia. He was all smiles and squeals and excitement at sharing with her, he was NOT happy when she repeatedly tried to hug him. Play with my toys all you like, just don't touch me.



8 comments:

Linsey said...

Bad news: the sleeping schedule thing gets out of whack all by itself - teething, sick, growth spurts, just because etc. Good news: babies can learn to sleep happily other places, stroller, car seat, laps, pack 'n plays at relative and friends houses etc. Bad news: usually initial changes to schedule are not pleasant for mom or baby. Good news: babies are adaptable, if he's tired he'll sleep (usually!!). Good luck!

Jessica said...

I think I might like your kid better than any other kid I'm not related to.

And it doesn't last long...it would help if he'd sleep in a stroller? I agree with what Linsey said.

Brown Sugar said...

Gabe I can not wait for you to come and play with me! you can scream in my ear like what it looks like you are doing to that poor child in the picture. I miss you.

Celia Fae said...

I disagree with Jessica and Linsey. My kids won't sleep anywhere but their own beds because I was a sleep nazi. Sometimes I look at sleeping children in church and shake my head in wonder.

I feel you on the Saturday thing. This is what I do: Choose one day to screw up the schedule. Leave after his first nap but before the second and then he might take the second in the car. Count on him being really tired the next day. You might have to skip church. Tell the Bishop it is okay.

WashingtonDegn said...

I was (am) a sleep nazi too, and I have never regretted it. Yes, it is very frustrating to have to be home so much while they nap, but that doesn't last forever, and it is so nice to know that when you do go out, Gabe won't be cranky and fussy because he is well-rested. Soon he'll be down to 2 naps a day, and will go to bed early, and then I have one magic word for you: BABYSITTERS. The great thing about your schedule is that he will go to bed early and you and Mario can go out guilt-free at night.

I always look at the restrictions that come with the sleep schedule as a relatively short-term sacrifice I make for happy babies. And, it is a great excuse to leave church early, which I have done now for 3 years.

TulipGirl said...

Linsey's right with the good news/bad news. We did BW and scheduling with the first two, and tossed it with the next two. In the long run, with older kids? Their sleep is all about the same--and the flexibility we had when we tossed BW was great!

Then again, you have to find what works for you and your family. . .

Grace and peace,

Julie said...

I agree marianne and celia, we usually throw caution to the wind with elliots nap on saturdays and just enjoy the day, she goes right back to her regular scheduled programming.

Rachel said...

I was doing an internet search on nap schedules and randomly came across your blog...and ha! I did exactly the same thing...except along with those two books, I also threw in some other book that was basically the same as BW. And I obeyed them like the law. At some point we gave up on them, but I'm still pretty anal about having baby at home, in bed at naptime - because she WON'T SLEEP anywhere else! So I have a friend that brags about how great her baby is - because he sleeps anywhere. But I still say I've got the good end of the deal. Her baby wakes up every night, sometimes once ah hour, and mine sleeps like a log. All night. Every night. And she has since being just a couple months old. So I think weigh out which is best - you can't have it all with babies! Plus my baby is happy and laughing 99% of the time. Without a silly pacifier.